Title: Frustration
Author: Rari

RATING: FRAO
PAIRING: Buffy/Giles (hints of past G/E)
FEEDBACK: Absolutely.
SPOILERS: A New Man, Who Are You
DISCLAIMER: It all belongs to Joss, the real king of the world, the WB, UPN, Fox, Mutant Enemy and anybody else who feels they own it. I'm just borrowing, lost in admiration, and then giving them back, memories wiped clean.

SUMMARY: Giles is frustrated. It has been TOO long since…well you get the picture.

NOTES: Set during season 5. Buffy's still with Riley but things aren't so great. Giles has his shop. Joyce is fine although she doesn't factor in this story so it doesn't really matter, but I'm telling you just in case you wanted to know. And Dawn's around somewhere, hanging out with Joyce unless my muse decides to put her in the story at some point and then I'll change this so never mind. No major bad guys feature in this story at any time other than Ethan Rayne without whom none of this would have been possible.

THANKS: To Lori Ann for her beta assistance, and Gileswench for keeping those creative…ah…juices flowing.

Frustration: Part 1

Giles opened his door to find Ethan standing there. "Ethan, what the hell do you want?"

Ethan pushed his way inside. "I was in town. I thought I'd drop by for a visit."

"The last time I saw you the military were carting you off to a rehabilitation center. How exactly did you get out?"

"What difference does it make? I'm here now. I thought we could go out for a drink."

"You are out of your bloody mind if you think I'm going drinking with you. You turned me into a demon the last time I did that."

"Yeah, but you had fun, didn't you?"

"I did have fun beating the crap out of you. I have to admit that."

Ethan winced. "Yes, as a Fyarl demon you do pack quite a bit more punch than you do as a tweed wearing librarian."

Giles looked down at the jeans and sweater he was wearing. "I do not wear tweed anymore and I haven't been a librarian for over a year. I wish people would stop saying that." He kicked the door shut. He moved to his kitchen. "Do you want a drink?"

"I thought you just said you wouldn't drink with me."

"No, I said I wouldn't go out drinking with you. Unless you've snuck in here while I wasn't looking and doctored all my alcohol I'm thinking I'm relatively safe." He glared at Ethan. "Do you want a drink, or not?" He slammed a bottle of scotch on the counter.

"Yes." Ethan prowled around the counter and looked at Giles. "What's the matter with you?"

"Nothing is the matter with me." Giles poured two large drinks. He handed one to Ethan and took his glass and the bottle into the living room.

"I've known you a long time…"

Giles interrupted. "Lucky you."

"…and I know when something is bothering you."

"Well, give the man a prize."

"So, tell your old friend Ethan all about it."

Giles barked out a laugh. "Right. Because I know I can trust you. You certainly wouldn't use anything I tell you against me."

"Ripper, I just like having a little fun."

Giles rested his head back on the couch. "I'm tired of your games. Go play with someone else." He lifted his head. "Oh wait, you don't have anyone else, do you? Gee, I wonder why?"

"Ouch. You are in a mood, aren't you?"

"Go away, Ethan."

"Not until you tell me what's bothering you."

"Hand me the phone, I want to call the Initiative."

"Tell me what's wrong. I hate to see you like this."

"You love to see me like this, Ethan. You like nothing more than to see me miserable and you know it."

"I know, but it's not as much fun if I don't know why you're miserable."

"My heart's bleeding for you." The phone rang. Giles looked up at the clock and then at the phone. He ignored it.

"Aren't you going to answer it?"

"No."

Ethan watched the phone as it rang. Finally he couldn't stand it. He grabbed for it. "Hello?"

"Giles? Is that you? You sound funny."

Ethan made a face and handed the phone to Giles. "It's for you. The old ball and chain."

Giles sighed but took the phone. "Yes, Buffy, what is it?"

"Who was that?"

"Someone who was just leaving."

Buffy humphed. "The phone rang so long I didn't think you were in."

"Where else would I be? Where else am I ever at this time of night, every night?"

"Well you don't have to be so crabby about it."

Giles took a deep breath. "What do you need, Buffy?"

"I just thought I'd call. Riley's busy and I was bored."

"I'm so touched."

"What's the matter with you? I thought you'd be glad I called."

"Oh yes, tossing out bread crumbs to the populace. How noble of you."

"Well, I knew you'd be home."

"Of course I'd be home. What else could I possibly be doing other than waiting for you to call? I'm home every sodding night unless I'm being knocked unconscious at some demon fest with you."

There was a pause. "Okay, well, watching paint dry is more fun than this so I'm gonna go now."

"Thanks so much for calling. It's been a pleasure." Giles hung up. And then he ripped the phone cord out of the wall.

Ethan's eyebrows rose ever so slightly. "Trouble in paradise?"

Giles snickered unpleasantly. "Paradise. Right."

Ethan poured Giles another drink. "Here you go, drink up."

Giles drank half the glass down. He eyed the glass blearily. "I should probably eat something. I don't think I've eaten all day."

"Oh no, you'll get drunk much faster on an empty stomach." Giles could hardly argue with that so he polished off the glass. Ethan filled it again. "Ready to tell me what's bothering you?"

"Nothing you can help me with."

"Now, how do you know that if you won't tell me?"

Giles looked at Ethan. "Do you think that if you get told something long enough that it becomes the truth?"

"I'm afraid to answer that without more information."

Giles just shook his head. "Do you remember how easy it was for me to find a woman to be with?"

"All you had to do was snap your fingers."

Giles snapped his fingers and looked around. "Doesn't seem to work anymore."

Ethan sat up in his chair. "Is that what this is about? You wanting a relationship?"

Giles snorted. "No, I've given up on ever having that. This is about something much more basic."

Ethan grinned. "All this fuss just because you want to get laid?" He filled Giles' glass again. "Look no further. I'm always available."

Giles rolled his eyes. "Do you remember how drunk you had to get me to do that?"

Ethan pointed at Giles' glass. "One more of those ought to do the trick."

Giles grimaced and put his glass down. "I think I'll embrace a life of celibacy."

Ethan pursed his lips. "What does this have to do with someone telling you something until it becomes the truth?"

There was a knock at the door. Giles stood up and flung a hand out at the door. "What perfect timing. You can see a live demonstration." He walked towards the door and threw it open. "Buffy, shouldn't you still be at home watching paint dry?"

"I was worried about you. You sounded so weird. But the phone doesn't seem to be working."

"I know. I pulled it out of the wall."

Buffy noticed Ethan. Her face grew dark. "What the hell does he want?"

Giles looked at Ethan. "That's exactly what I asked him. Don't worry, he was just leaving." He hesitated. "On second thought, feel free to stay. I think I'll leave." He looked around for his jacket and shrugged it on. Giles began patting down his pockets looking for his keys.

Buffy stood in the doorway. "What do you mean, you're leaving?"

"Just what I said. I'm leaving. I'm going to get laid."

Buffy glared at Ethan. "What did you do to him?"

Ethan just laughed. "Not a thing. Why should I? He's doing so well on his own."

Buffy turned a puzzled gaze towards Giles. "What did you mean by that?"

Giles turned to Ethan. "Now pay attention." He turned back to Buffy. "The I'm going to get laid part?"

"Yes."

"What do you think I meant?"

"Well, not what it usually means, that's for sure."

"And why not?"

"Come on, please and eeww."

Giles gritted his teeth. "Let's try an experiment. You say it Buffy."

"Say what?"

"Say, I'm going to get laid."

"I'm not going to say…"

"Say it."

"Fine. I'm going to get laid."

Giles cocked his head to the side. "See, when you say it, it seems perfectly clear to me. I'm thinking that it means that you're going to go find Riley or whatever worthless excuse for a boyfriend you currently have and go shag him silly." He turned to Ethan. "Doesn't that seem clear to you?"

Ethan nodded. "Oh, quite clear."

Giles turned again to Buffy. "Okay, let's try this again. You ready? I'm going to go get laid." He spoke the sentence very slowly. "Was it clearer this time?"

Buffy looked at Giles as if he had lost his mind. "Did Ethan put a spell on you?"

Giles rolled his eyes. "Is it that inconceivable to you that I want to get laid?"

Buffy squinched her face up. "Why are you acting like this? What's the matter?"

"Nothing's the matter. I'm going to go find some woman and have sex with her. Maybe I'll find two women and have sex with them both."

Buffy put her hand on his forehead. "Are you sick?"

Giles turned to Ethan. "It's like I'm a eunuch. Watch this." Looking at Buffy he put out his hands as if he was going to scare her. "Giles and sex."

Buffy made a face and shivered. "Would you stop that? You're gonna give me nightmares."

"Five bloody years of this. I'm sick of it." Spying his keys on the counter underneath his mail he pounced on them. Giles brushed by Buffy and headed out. Looking over his shoulder he tossed out a final message. "Don't wait up."

End of Part 1